If only u were here..

Almost two years since your passing. And I can clearly remember everything, every single detail, how and when it happened. 14/1/2012, the day I was supposed to go to a seminar. I shook your hands and it was icy cold. I knew something was not right, but I left anyway, thinking I already made a promise that I'd go. So I went, arrived at where Im supposed to be, and received the most nerve-wrecking call of my life. Rushed back to the hospital, by the time I got there you were not there anymore.. I remember crying so bad to dad, asking why did you have to leave? I haven't spent enough time with you.
....

Al-fatihah. I really really miss u ma. There is really nothing I can do apart from praying for you. But if only you were here, I'd tell you what happened in my everyday life, about my first extraction, my first RCT. Because no one would understand my excitement better than you would. The thought of you not being here, during my graduation, or my wedding or when I have my "first" of everything just kills me..

Anyway mum. I'm almost there.. finishing the last few months and requirements of my final year. And after that, who knows what will happen.. I love you. xoxo.

p/s: Im getting used to calling for "Baa?!" instead of "Maa..?!" everytime I come home, apart from calling my cats of course. :(